Spoiled Children of Divorce


Christian Brando

Marlon Brando’s troubled Son, Christian, passed away yesterday in Los Angeles, California. He had been hospitalized for pneumonia. Christian was 49 years old.  May he Rest in Peace.

Christian was the eldest of Brando’s nine children. His Mother, Anna Kashfi, was also an actress. She separated from Brando when Christian was 5 months old and the couple divorced on Apr. 22, 1959 (can’t vouch for any dates here). The couple remained in a custody dispute over Christian until 1972 when Kashfi abducted the 13 year boy and took him to Mexico. She was sent to jail and subsequently lost all chance for custody. His Mother had drug and alcohol problems.

Christian dropped out of High School and held minor acting jobs. As can be expected he had emotional problems and ended up killing his sister Cheyenne’s boyfriend while arguing over whether the boyfriend had beaten his pregnant half-sister. He spent 5 years in jail for the murder. Cheyenne gave birth to the baby but hanged herself at Age 25. Christian was recently divorced for violent behavior to his wife and her daughter.

This is a description of his childhood from http://www.astrotheme.com. (Date of parents’ separation is different from one mentioned in obituary in newspaper (www.mercurynews.com):

Kashfi turned to barbiturates and alcohol and the couple divorced a year after Christian’s birth in May 1959. Christian was passed between the two as their relationship became more and more hostile and abusive. The author Nellie Bly claimed that “When the Brandos quarreled, Anna displayed a ‘frightening’ rage,” and that “Anna left baby Christian alone in her car parked on Wilshire Boulevard while she confronted Brando in his office, ‘beating at him with her fists, in a frenzy of rage.” There was a protracted custody battle between Kashfi and Brando until he eventually won custody of Christian aged 13 after an incident when Christian was taken out of school to Mexico by Kashfi without Brando’s consent.

Christian had little good contact with his father, being raised by nannies and servants, moving between Hollywood and the private island near Tahiti. A reluctant witness to his father’s sexual exploits and bizarre behavior, Christian complained that:
“The family kept changing shape, I’d sit down at the breakfast table and say, “Who are you?””



Psychologists from Divorced Families
January 27, 2008, 6:00 pm
Filed under: Exemplary Children of Divorce, therapy, Uncategorized | Tags: ,

I suppose it’s easy to see why the Psych community is oblivious to growing up in Divorced Families. I just quickly ran over a list of the Forefathers of Psychology and, I may have made some errors, but it looks like none, nada, zippo, grew up in Divorce.

This is my list.

Alfred Adler; Carl Jung; Sigmund Freud; Erich Fromm; Richard Dawkins; Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, William James, Kay Redfield Jameson, Arthur Janov, Frederick Skinner, Alice Miller, Ken Wilber, Carl Rogers, Jean Piaget, R.D. Laing, Howard Gardner, Jerome Bruner, Jacques Lacan.

Who needs to listen to more problems if you’ve grown up listening non-stop to your parents’ problems?  I’ve known a couple of therapists from divorced families. They were highly manipulative people who worked at the most God awful social work jobs.  Definitely not the trailblazers of the profession. It always fascinates me to see books written about growing up in divorce that weren’t written by people who grew up in divorce. Written by the shameless self marketers who are looking for a niche. It’s the same thing with anorexia.  As an ex-anorexic I’ve been fascinated by the amount of fat therapists who want to work with anorexics.  They just love bowing down their heads to show off their 30 chins and tsk, tsk, tsk about how sick the anorexics are.   It’s literally abusive. I went to a free lecture in my community of a panel of people speaking on eating disorders.  They had a family speak, they had a psychiatrist speak, they had an ex fat woman speak, and they had a fat therapist speak.  There were no anorexics or bulimics telling their stories.  The fat therapist laughingly told about how much more full of joy fat people are to be around than the sad, wispy little control freaks in the clinic.  And no one thought anything of it.  Whenever I hear about psych studies that say that treatments don’t work, well, it’s just amusing.  Fat people who can’t go on a diet.  What can you do?  The psych industry is a multi-billion dollar industry with no accountability.  You can put on your puppy dog face and offer treatments that offer no cure and it’s legal.  Yoo hoo.



Are Worldbeaters from Divorced Families?

This is a really quick survey on something I started to wonder about while browsing through the Biography Section in the Public Library for Children of D. I noticed that a whole lot of successful people come from families where the Father was an abusive Tyrant. I suppose this is useful exposure to have for behaviors that will ensure success in the World. But, and I don’t know if I’m going to be able to explain this clearly, I think also that often Divorce comes as a reaction to one parent trying to get away from Tyranical behaviors of the other parent. So, this is the good side of Divorce. Not accepting Tyrannical behaviors in society. Neither George Bush nor Dick Cheney are Child of D, perhaps a good reason why they don’t understand the wonders of habeus corpus.

I’ve used 3 websites to come up with lists of Tyrants and Dictators and kept the lists to 20th Century and current dictators because Divorce wasn’t common before then. There isn’t much discussion about childhood matters for some of these guys so more research is needed. The kids from the big Divorce Boom in the 70s and 80s still aren’t in power so it’s difficult to know how they will lead. It certainly is nice to think that possibly one of the good products of Divorce is the eradication of Tyranny from the World. Low self-esteem can work wonders in deflating the more willful and big-ego’ed of us. (I know all about that, let me tell ya). Astrologically speaking, there is a big transit coming up which is associated with Tyrannical behaviors and will be the first test for this generation.

This is the list along with the ones who I can determine experienced Divorce from the list at http://users.erols.com/mwhite28/tyrants.htm):

  • Mao Zedong
  • Adolf Hitler – illegitimate, bad childhood, parents together
  • Josif Stalin – Mother promiscuous, Paternity questionable, Father abusive and rarely around
  • Chiang Kai-shek (China) – Father died Age 2
  • Enver Pasha (Turkey) – Father died
  • Hirohito (Japan)
  • Ho Chi Minh (North Vietnam)
  • Kim Il Sung (North Vietnam) – Father was Ho Chi Minh
  • Vladimir Lenin (USSR) – Father died Age 16
  • Leopold II (Belgium)
  • Nicholas II (Russia)
  • Pol Pot (Cambodia)
  • Saddam Hussein (Iraq) – Father abandoned family 6 months before Saddam was born, 13 year old brother died around time of birth also; sent to live with Uncle until Age 3; Mother remarried and stepfather abusive, 3 half brothers; ran away Age 10 and lived with Uncle and relatives for rest of childhood.
  • Tojo Hideki (Japan)
  • Wilhelm II (Germany)
  • Yahya Khan (Pakistan)

Here also is Parade Magazine’s list of Dictators of the Current World from 2006:

(http://www.parade.com/articles/editions/2006/edition_01-22-2006/Dictators)

  • Omar al-Bashir (Darfur)
  • Kim Jong-Il (North Korea)
  • Than Shwe (Burma)
  • Robert Mugabe (Zimbabwe) – Father abandonned family 1934, Age 10
  • Islan Karimov (Uzbekistan) – grew up in orphanage
  • Hu Jintao (China) – Mother died Age 7, raised by Aunt
  • King Abdullah (Saudi Arabia) – Father multiple wives
  • Saparmurat Niyazov (Turkmenistan) – grew up in orphanage, Father killed WWII, rest of family killed in earthquake
  • Seyed Ali Khamane’i (Iran)
  • Teodoro Obiang Nguema (Equatorial New Guinea)

This list adds 10 more names (http://www.lkwdpl.org/schools/horacemann/dictators/).

Among these are:

  • Aleksandr Lukashenko (Belarus) – Mother was unmarried
  • Fidel Castro (Cuba) – illegitimate child of Father’s maid


More Fun with the Stats Search Feature
January 26, 2008, 4:56 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I need to start a weekly listing of my favorite searches that lead people to this blog.  First I should just keep a weekly tally of stepmothers who hate their spoiled brat stepchildren.  Rarely, very rarely, is there ever a search of people who are looking for information on how “To Be a Good Stepparent.”  Absolutely nobody questions their own lack of ability or bad character.  It’s really tough for the people out there who are good stepparents.

Ok. First of all, someone wants “Statistics of spoiled kids in United States.”  I wonder, is this an American or someone from a foreign land wanting to know this.  Because I live around a lot of rich immigrant kids and I have to tell you they are the most out of control little brats in the world.

Then.  “Divorce Children Partner Sleeping.”  Wow.  This is a big problem that someone ought to really try to address.  I went for special EMDR treatments to try to erase a memory regarding this topic.  This is a therapy where the therapist swings a pendulum and you re-tell the incident.  Supposedly, constantly changing the position of your eyes while remembering the trauma releases the emotional charge from your system.  The therapist, a single mother, got defensive and wouldn’t let me have any more EMDR treatments.  The treatment actually did work.  My Mother used to bring guys home from the bar after closing and would scream at me to get out of bed and play music for them.  This would be at 3:00am or so and I was 15 so I suppose it was extra humiliating to be a forced music slave for old drunk guys at that age.  My Mother wouldn’t stop screaming at me and threatening me (breaking the instrument, getting rid of it, killing me, kicking me out the house, of course I was selfish).  The men would just sit there and let her do it until I played.  One night there were two men and the one guy was a psychologist who was still dressed in his tennis outfit from his game the afternoon before.  He was very drunk and was staring at me as if I were a lab rat in an extremely stressful environment and he was merely there was observation.  I didn’t even tell the EMDR person that he was a psychologist because I knew she couldn’t handle it.  So, anyway, the look in his conceited drunk eyes is still with me but my heart doesn’t cue up like a twisted dishrag when I think about it.  I don’t remember the other guy.  I don’t remember any of the other guys who I had to play for on other times.  I remember my Mother’s threats and I remember this guy’s ugly eyes.  Thing is, I was 15.  What a way to go through puberty.  So, and yeah she probably slept with them, it was the 70’s pre-AIDS, pre-herpes even.  If you’re that drunk who cares if you slept with someone, really.

“Percentage of kids who hate their stepparents.”  Someone should have asked “Percentage of abusive stepparents” to see if there’s any correlation.  I suspect that most stepchildren feel nothing for their stepparents but what do I know so most stepparents should just relax in this regard.  Feeling nothing is the Child of D’s greatest survival tool. The stepparent should learn this as well.  If you guys don’t get along then, let’s be real, everyone’s just playing a waiting game until the kid turns 18 and can be kicked out.



Successful Children of Divorce – Augusten Burroughs

Augusten Burroughs wrote about the very popular story about his life after his parents’ divorce in Running with Scissors. His Mother was mentally ill and with the aid of her psychiatrist went completely over the edge. Burroughs went to live with the psychiatrist and his family and then bounced back and forth between the Psychiatrist’s house and his Mother’s. Haven’t read the book but saw the movie which I didn’t like very much. Crazy families are really difficult to portray “realistically.” Especially considering how much was going on in Burrough’s life at the same time. The absent Father, the crazy Mother, the crazy Family, the obnoxious authoritarian psychiatry, the molestation, and the Coming Out. It should have been filmed in the format of a perpetually exploding bomb.

Here’s a Burroughs quote from a Washington Post article about the book and talking about his childhood:

“I thought people would be bored by it, honestly,” Burroughs says. “Bored or just . . . so put off. You can’t even really describe the book without it seeming X-rated. I spent a lot of years not telling people about my childhood, because I was embarrassed or ashamed. People who grew up in nice families and went to Ivy League schools — to me that’s what’s shocking. I’m riveted by stories like that: ‘Really? You still talk to people you knew in high school? You’re on speaking terms with both your parents? Tell me more.’ “

(http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn?pagename=article&node=&contentId=A19023-2002Jul29&notFound=true)

Burroughs’ Mother is a poet and his Father was head of the Philosophy Department at University of Massachusetts (now passed). Burroughs has one older brother. Age 13 Burroughs was sodomized by the 33 year old guy who lived behind the psychiatrist’s house. At some point soon after, Burroughs dropped out of High School. Eventually he started working for an advertising company and worked his way up into Copy Writing. He developed serious addictions problems and wrote about his alcoholism in Dry.

At Age 19, changed name from Chris Robinson to Augusten Burroughs. Around Age 36, publishes memoir. Has written a number of best-sellers since.

The Psychiatrist’s family sued for mis-representation in 2007.



Exemplary Children of Divorce – Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou is one of the top poets in the United States. She wrote about her 1st 18 years (I won’t call it a childhood) in I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.

Angelou’s parents divorced when she was 3 years old. She was sent with her 4 year old brother alone by train to live with their father’s Mother. When she was Age 8, her Father sent the children back to live with their Mother and StepFather. The Stepfather raped Angelou. She told her brother who relayed the message and subsequently the Stepfather spent a day in jail. Days after being released he was found beaten to death and Angelou felt so responsible for his death that she remained mute for the next 5 years. She spent more time with her Grandmother and then living back and forth with both parents. At one point she lived homeless for a month with other children. She gave birth to her son 3 weeks after graduating from High School.

And she was the first Black female Streetcar Conductor in San Francisco.

Please look up some quotes of Maya Angelou’s.  They are very inspiring.  This is from http://www.brainyquotes.com:

“I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.



Extroversion v. Introversion
January 23, 2008, 8:05 am
Filed under: Astrology stuff

While screaming about how obnoxious the psychoblabbers are I am reminded to say something that I’ve been pondering.

Don’t know if any studies have been done of this, but I sort of wonder if Introverted Children are harmed by Divorce much more than Extroverts.  They certainly are not well accepted by society.  An Extrovert might actually enjoy having two whole new sets of stepfamilies to smooze in.  An Introvert is going to be driven inward even more and may develop some weird behaviors because of it. If you’ve got 2 families you have half the time to yourself that you would in a one family household and for an introvert this is lethal.  And divorced parents are so needy.

There is a correlation to this in the Astrology charts I’ve been looking at.  The Successful kids often have highly extroverted charts.  In their charts, very often the House indicating Home and Family is empty.  This would indicate that Homelife is simply not that big of a deal to these people so if something goes wrong there they won’t really be impacted, well, until….

I did have a conversation with a psychology student about Introversion among psychology people and she said that out of a class of 20 only two of the students were introverts. That certainly explains why the psych profession is so bad. How can extroverts delve into the depths of the human soul?  They don’t even know it’s there.  Well, Dante had Virgil to help him walk through Heaven and Hell and everything inbetween so maybe they have ways, dunno.  Yeah, and Odysseus returning back from the Trojan War.  He was certainly an extrovert.  Same thing, he was confronted with all kinds of symbolic life distractions and he was always surrounded by his guys.  I’m talking to myself here, an Introverted type of thing.

I just need to add more bio’s.  hmpf.