Spoiled Children of Divorce

If Your Parents Divorced When You Were Age 4-5: Outer Limits / Abducted / Nester / Justice
June 3, 2010, 11:14 pm
Filed under: Astrology stuff, Exemplary Children of Divorce, Uncategorized

A person who experienced a parent’s divorce between the Ages of 4 and 5 has a number of different influences to check on.  The first influence is the child’s first trine that transiting Jupiter makes to itself in the natal chart.  This extends the Jupiter vibe that was discussed in the last post from Age 3.  So everything that I described during the 3d year will apply.

Difference is that the Age 3 influence is that of a square which can be considered a difficult or challenging influence.  A child is catching on to all kinds of Jupiterian aspects which involve developing Abstract Thinking and Having thoughts and Opinions about what goes on in the environment and is struggling with them.  A child’s vocabulary is expanding rapidly and he is beginning to play.  I even mentioned at that point that Jupiter can be clumsy (or at least I think I did.  Anyway, Jupiter is clumsy).  Turns out that a child does go through a clumsy phase at that age because his body is growing so quickly (from Yale Child Center/Gessell Institute).  Some children will also begin to stutter at this age so their communication style can also go through a difficult phase.  I talked as well about how Jupiter is concerned with International Affairs and literally crosses borders between cultures.

Well, then we move to the Trine aspect.  The Trine influence is considered an easy aspect.  Jupiter who already represents Luck and Optimism and Joviality might become too much of a good thing.  At any rate, Jupiter’s energies It will flow well at this point.  In Jupiter’s case this can sometimes lead to overdoing and overkill.  Just plain old too much is too much.

In Gesell Institute’s Child Behavior (which is the early version of the Yale Child Center study books I’ve been referring to), authors Ilg and Ames literally use the Key Word phrase to describe this age as “out of bounds.”  They say that Children “out of bounds” “motorwise” and “Emotionally.”  Children at this age are especially loquacious. They begin to use “potty mouth”.  In addition to the Jupiter trine fun, one must remember that a child will have his 2d Mars return around the time of his 4th Birthday.  And, of course, the Birthday is the “Solar Return”  and he will be very conscious of how much fun Birthdays are at this age.  This is a convergence of all the fire energies put together at one age.

Gesell Institute also describes how the Imagination at this time “has no ‘reasonable’ limits.”  I described how Jupiter also co-rules Pisces and the Imagination.  Jupiter exaggerates.  from p. 31 of Gesell Institute’s Child Behavior:  “Yet to the average 4-year-old the line between fact and fiction is a very thin, flexible line.  He may not actually be telling falsehoods.  It’s just more interesting that way, and he may come to believe his own imaginings, which become real to him.”  There is talk about how parents must use firmness to keep the child’s thinking straight.  Imagine what step-parents could do to interrogate a child at this age, rather than to just let him/her go on a bit with the stories.  It seems that in the 50s when Child Behavior says that children will naturally grow out of this phase with proper parenting.

In keeping with my idea that a child going through a divorce will hold on to much of the influences of whatever planetary return phase he is at into adult life, I’ll try to show how this may play out.  The group of successful people I have on my list is longer for this age than for most which might show the Jupiterian abundance theme in itself.  Many on the list are actresses and performers and politicians.  They are people who show a positive and upbeat vibe to the public.

There is another set of influences at this age which begins around the age of 3 1/2.  There is an Asteroid Belt which is held between the orbits of Mars and Jupiter called the Kuiper Belt.  In Astrology these Asteroids mostly represent female principles.  They became popular in astrology at about the same time that Divorce began to boom in society and the feminist movement took hold.  They provide a nice balance to the Mars and Jupiter influence.

I talked about Vesta, ruler of Hearth and Home, in the last post.  Vesta has a return roughly around the middle of the 3d year.

During the 4th year there are a few more returns that occur within this Asteroid Belt.  Each one shows a different aspect of strong female archetypes.  There is one more after this, that of Lilith.  Lilith doesn’t really play by anyone else’s game.  Her story is quite another thing so I suppose she celebrates her return off somewhere during the 9th year.

First Kuiper Belt Return for Age 4 is the Juno Return.  Juno in ancient mythology was Jupiter’s wife and therefore she represents the woman’s side of a stable marriage. If I remember correctly, the Romans portrayed her as a very dignified married woman.  The Greeks showed her as more emotional.  She is the jealous wife with the philandering husband.  In any respect, she is “The Wife,” she is a Goddess, and she is Queen.  Many years ago there was a movie called Short Cuts which patched together several different Raymond Carver stories about relationships.  Jennifer Jason Leigh, who I already talked about under the Age 2/Mars post, delivers an incredible line about being “The Wife.”  She stakes her claim as a power to be reckoned with.  I suspect that Children of Divorce are going to be much more aware of the power of the Institution of Marriage as it relates to women as they have watched their single Mothers go through what is generally considered a great social demotion for many wives.  Children growing up in Divorce have to deal with self-esteem issues that might grow out of this extra demotion.

I had actually noticed within my list of famous people who went through a parent’s divorce at Age 4 that many seemed to have a sort of “nesting instinct.” One can really sense the influence of the Vesta Return and the Juno Return and the Ceres Return which all occur between 3.5 and 4.6 years.  Actresses who withdraw from their careers to raise families, that kind of thing.  There is an ease about giving up “power” here.  Interesting that the list of successful people from this year seems longer than most of the others (the lists aren’t very long in any category).

I was happy to find that Stephanie Staal actually provides a description of “the Nesters” in her book The Love They Lost.  She does include an Age 4 person in the section which discusses the Nesters.  Staal’s book also describes a lot of descriptions of practical housing stories from grown adults.  Perhaps this means that this is  the aspect of the divorce that they remember best.  She talks about one person who said that his Mother saved the children’s feelings by keeping the kids together and insisting that everyone still get together for dinner every night.  That makes practical sense, but in split homes with single parents it’s often not possible.  It’s just very interesting to me that the person who mentioned this just happened to belong to the Vesta/Juno/Ceres age of 4.

There seems to be a lot of famous people on my list from this age, many are women, which is odd, and many seem to withdraw from the limelight in order to raise kids and to be wives.  Tipper Gore, who served as Vice President’s wife for eight years, belongs in this group.  It’s pretty interesting that the Gores have just announced that they are splitting after 40 years of marriage.  That’s one hell of a nest to give up.  Tipper must also be under the Pallas influence as well (description coming up).

The next two Asteroids seem to have Returns very close in time with each other.

Pallas is very interesting from a Child of D’s point of view because she doesn’t have a Mother. She is also interesting from a modern feminist’s view point because she is a very independent and wise woman.   Athene popped out of Zeus’ head (or so Zeus said – Zeus is the Greek name for Jupiter).  Pallas has no mother which is probably a lot of women’s ideal existence.  Athene never marries and remains a strong and stable influence of higher intelligence in the Greek Pantheon.  Her Myth adds the concept of Mercy to how Justice is delivered in Society as a whole.   The old idea that “An Eye for An Eye” provides proper justice became a barbaric concept in the eyes of the Greeks.  Two wrongs rarely make a right.  Since I don’t have actual dates for the splits of parents for people who went through divorce at this age I can’t really say for sure but I will just say that these children do seem to succeed in teaching people to think about what Justice really is.  Julia Roberts and Truman Capote both celebrated great success through the creative fields.  Roberts won an Oscar for her portrayal of Erin Brokovich and Truman Capote got inside the mind of a killer in “In Cold Blood.”  Of course, Tipper Gore has been outspoken about many aspects of the law as well.  Julie Andrews also belongs to this age group and she became a superstar for portraying freedom loving and wise Single Women such as, well, as Mary Poppins and also as Maria van Trapp in The Sound of Music.  For today’s crowd these roles may not seem to be very significant but in olden days when I was a kid most single women were seldom praised within society’s structure.  Dian Fossey, an anthropologist who studied and cared for apes out in the wild could also be seen as a strong Pallas figure.

The 3d Asteroid to look at is Ceres which is a very interesting influence to look at from the point of view of a child of divorce.  The Ceres Return occurs roughly around the age of 4.5, same as the Pallas Return.  Ceres was once considered a real planet but was demoted in the way that Pluto recently was.  Both are now considered Dwarf Planets.  By coincidence they share the same common Mythological story about Custodial Battles of Ceres’ daughter Persephone.  Ceres is ruler of Agriculture.  In Astrology she represents a person’s nurturing ability and will show the spot in a person’s life what the person will be able to truly love and care for.  Pluto rules the Underworld in Mythology and rules Death, Sex and Taxes in Astrology.  I’ve discussed what a prominent influence he is in Divorce as his House 8 rules shared assets.  In the story Pluto falls in love with Persephone and abducts her and holds her down in the underworld.  Ceres is so enraged that she casts a drought all over the land and all the crops die.  The two make amends by sharing custody of Persephone.  She lives with her Mother for half of the year and lives in the underworld with Pluto for half the year.  I suppose the fact that she’s not Pluto’s daughter doesn’t quite fit the Divorce family model, or hopefully it doesn’t, but it’s pretty interesting to see how commonly the idea of abduction comes up in the Children of D from this Age group, or at least the custodial battles seem to be very prominently exposed parts of their stories.

The Ceres Myth and the Persephone Myth plays very strongly in the lives of many Children of Divorce who go through abductions and custody battles and being shuffled back and forth between parents.

Beatle’s Singer John Lennon was abducted first by Social Services and raised by his Aunt and Uncle because his Mother couldn’t care for him.  Then he was abducted for a couple of weeks by his birth Father.  A very recent story in the news is about Journalist

Laura Ling is a journalist who was covering a story about human trafficking between the border of North Korea and China was caught, arrested and held in jail for several months in North Korea.  One can immediately see the Jupiter influence in her story through the Journalism aspect and the interest in foreign affairs.

It’s extremely interesting to see that she was going through both a Ceres and a Pallas Return when she was released last Summer on Aug. 4, 2009.  Laura was going through several much stronger transits as well, especially through Pluto and Moon and Venus. This shows that the Planets were repeating the same theme in her chart.  Laura’s older Sister Lisa was a strong factor in her release (sisters are indicated by Venus).  Laura also seems to be a Nester type as well.  She married before her older sister. And just yesterday (June 2 in the evening) she gave birth to a baby daughter.

At first I couldn’t figure out how magician David Blaine could possibly fit in with this age group aside from the fact that Wikipedia says that he was 4 years old when his parents split.  I know next to nothing about Blaine but it seems that a Magician might not show much influence from these Asteroids.  What the Gessell Institute says about kids at this age not being able to distinguish between reality and imagination would certainly apply.  The exuberant Jupiter influence can be seen, of course because considering the antics he pulls I’d say that Blaine is an over optimistic guy.  Then I realized that being a Magician is all about making things disappear and reappear.  That’s sort of like abduction and switching back and forth between the Underworld and the Real World.  Blaine had a really tragic childhood which shows that he may actually have a strong influence from his Nodal Axis.  I’m going to talk about the Nodal Axis as part of the Age 5 influence but the Nodes make their first square to each other before the 5th Birthday.  Blaine’s parents divorced when he was 4 so he could have been influenced by this other transit as well.  His Mother remarried when Blaine was 10 which corresponds to the first Nodal Opposition.  And his Mother pass away when Blaine was 19 which is just after the first Nodal Return.  His North Node is in the sign of Capricorn which rules parents and especially Fathers.  I suppose a child who has watched his Father do a couple of disappearing acts might have a whole lot of material to apply to a Magic Act.

Copyright 2010.  Spoiled Children of Divorce blog.  All Rights Reserved.

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