Spoiled Children of Divorce


Exemplary Children of Divorce – Writer James Ellroy

Here’s an article written by James Ellroy about trying to find his Mother’s killer. He also writes about being a Child of Divorce.

GQ (July 9, 2007):  “My Mother’s Killer.”

I think I’ve already written about Ellroy because I read his book. Sorry I’m too lazy to remember the title. He explains being a part of the Divorce boom of the 1950’s in California. Have met another man, a vacuum cleaner salesman, whose Mother was murdered by her date out in Las Vegas. I spent about 3 hours listening to his story. This was a while ago.



Child Custody Battle is Allegedly Reason for 2015 Roden Family Murders in Ohio

After about 3 years’ investigation law enforcement arrested 4 family members for the 2015 murders of 8 family members in Ohio. At the time it seemed obvious that the murders were drug related as pot farms were found at three of the four homes where victims were found.

Daily Beast article here.

Instead, guess what? It was a custody battle. The lives of three of the children living in the homes were spared. Their parents and grandparents were murdered execution style while they slept. The alleged murderers are from the Wagner clan:  George “Billy” Wagner III, Angela Wagner, George Wagner IV, Edward “Jake” Wagner. They had been planned for months and then moved to Alaska after the murders. Two grandmothers were arrested as accomplices.

Jake was an ex-boyfriend of Hanna Roden. They shared a 3 year old daughter. Hanna had just given birth to a daughter 5 days before and at age 19 was one of the victims. Jake thought he was also the newborn’s father.

Remember the lyrics “You only hurt the ones you love….” Family Court is the most violent court there is. Most mass murders are family related. Apparently potheads aren’t as non violent as they are made out to be. And there isn’t as much publicity about family problems as there are about drug dealing because the press has kept pretty silent.

From the article:

“According to Governor Mike DeWine (article says DeWine is Attorny General but I don’t think that’s correct). … “‘This is just the most bizarre story I’ve ever seen in being involved in law enforcement,’ …. adding that the defendants had an “obsession” with custody and controlling children connected to the victims.”

“In April 2016, eight members of the Rhoden family—ranging in age from 16 to 44—were found shot and killed in their beds in four different homes. Three of those houses had large marijuana farms, authorities said.”

 



Step-Mother sentenced to die by lethal injection for murder of step-daughter

Stephanie Moss is a 36-year-old Atlanta woman who was found guilty of starving her step-daughter, 10-year old Emani, to death back in 2013. This is a Yahoo article and is lacking all kinds of information.

This article says that Emani’s Father was sentenced in 2015 and is facing a life sentence. He admitted to burning the 10-year old’s 32 pound body and putting it in the apartment trash cans. It seems that Tiffany is using the Judicial System to commit suicide because she didn’t retain a lawyer for her defense and didn’t speak when asked to represent herself. She will be murdered by lethal injection in June if no one comes to her defense. There is no mention of whether Emani went to school or was seen in public.

Really tragic case. Please hand your child over to Protective Services before it gets to this. I took a sociology class last year on Family Dynamics and there was a whole chapter on Divorce. Yay. I did another little research project on filicide and some research actually shows that step-parents are less likely to abuse the step-children than the biological parents. I’ve read elsewhere that police will automatically suspect a step-father in any household where a child is harmed. So, I’m not sure which is true at this point and have no clarity on this issue whatsoever.



Tragedy in Florida – Trayvon Martin
March 26, 2012, 10:56 pm
Filed under: multiple households, separate households, teenagers, Total Weirdness, Violence

It seems that Florid is extra hard on Children of Divorce.  Kids from divorced families are often wandering around, trying to escape tensions at home.  It seems that the Florida community can’t handle this.

A while back, I wrote a post about the high school senior, Taylor Weinman, who was stalked by the police for more than a month and then arrested and held by house arrest for more than a year.  Taylor was skateboarding around the neighborhood in the middle of the night, back and forth from his mother and father’s houses, during a time when people’s cats were being mauled.  The media convicted and humiliated Tyler.  Everyone called him the Cat Murderer. 

A reader left a message on the blog entry I wrote giving an update on Tyler’s criminal status.  Turns out a forensics expert determined that stray dogs were responsible for the cat killings.  Tyler was exonerated of the crimes.  He was arrested right before his high school graduation and missed a couple of keys years in there.  Last report I read he was planning to go to College.  Hope he made it and is doing well.

Here’s another story even more tragic.  Trayvon Martin was 17 years old.  I believe he lived with his Mother in Miami but had just been expelled from high school for truancy for 5 days.  He was staying at his Father’s girlfriends’ house in Sanford, Florida.  Trayvon wandered out to the store to buy some candy and drinks.  He was talking to his girlfriend on his phone when he noticed that some guy was following him.  Trayvon was African American and it turns out that there had been a bunch of robberies in the neighborhood and people suspected some Black boys of committing the crime.  So, a guy named George Zimmerman, who works as a security guard for the gated community where Martin’s Father’s girlfriend lives, saw Trayvon, called the cops, and then decided to pursue the kid on his own.  We don’t know what happened beyond that.  After the last 3 weeks or so of media frenzy and stoning, the police now say that Trayvon had attacked Zimmerman for following him but that he’s considered the aggressor in this case.  Trayvon was shot in the chest and killed.  George Zimmerman says that he was fearing for his life and has not been arrested. 

Again we have an unbelievable media frenzy convicting everyone.  The African American community is in an uproar over the racial undertone of the problem.   Meanwhile, they are insisting that George Zimmerman is White when Zimmerman insists he’s Hispanic.  People, even clergymen, are wearing hoodies in defense of what they feel is the main reason that Zimmerman attacked Trayvon.  I’m not sure if there’s anyway that Trayvon could have known that Zimmerman was a security guard, if he had a uniform on or what.  I haven’t been able to find that information.  If Zimmerman was just driving around the neighborhood I can certainly see that there’s a big problem here.

With regards to growing up in Divorce I guess it would be great for people to develop awareness that strange kids will show up in the neighborhood.  These kids and their parents should maybe be very aware that if there are problems in the neighborhood that they have to be more aware than the average population about anything they do that isn’t typical.  Teenagers in stepfamilies may spend a lot more time out of the house because they feel uncomfortable. If they live with a single parent they may get out of the house to get out of their parents’ hair because they don’t want to be a burden.  They may just not be as watched and parented as kids from intact families. 

Strangers need to be aware that it’s a good sign if these kids are outside taking breathers.  Often their lives are extremely stressful.   They may only live in the neighborhood part time and may receive a lot of suspicious glances.  It seems that Trayvon’s Mother lives in one place, and he was staying at his Father’s girlfriends’ house.  His Father may live at that last house or may have his own house.  That would make for 3 neighborhoods.  And a kid who might look like he doesn’t belong anywhere and who looks more suspicious because of that.

Trayvon Martin’s Mother is now merchandising slogans associated with the uproar.  In a Time interview with the parents information about Trayvon’s past is revealed.  The parents’ divorce is discussed:

After his parents divorced — an amicable parting — Trayvon served as a liaison between them, “sending little messages back and forth between us,” says Martin. Fulton, who works as a government programs manager, says, “Trayvon was a mama’s boy. He would give me a kiss in the morning. He would check on us in the evening before I went to bed.” When he talked about wanting to attend Florida A&M University in Tallahassee, he blushed when Fulton kiddingly replied, “What, and just leave me at home?”

Read more: http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,2110066,00.html#ixzz1qGQUqPMqead more: http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,2110066,00.html#ixzz1qGQUqPMq

It looks like Trayvon played football at his high school.  He looks like an incredibly nice kid.  He actually looks a lot like President Obama and Obama made a comment in that regard.  –Had to look up the astrology to see if there was some kind of planetary connection and it’s amazing.  A person’s physical appearance is ruled by the sign that was rising when they were born.  Obama’s got an Aquarius Rising.  Trayvon’s natal Sun is in conjunction with Obama’s rising sign within just a few degrees. 

Rest in Peace, Trayvon.



“May die 2day”

Taboo subject here.  Even more forbidden than trying to seek help about how to deal with abusive step-parents.

This article is about a Mother who couldn’t get food stamps to feed her 2 children.  During an almost 7 hour stand off at the Welfare Office in Laredo, Texas, Rachel Grimmer’s 12-year old daughter posted a few frightening messages on her Facebook account about what she was going through as Mommy waves her gun around in despair.  At one point, she says she’s bored.  Guess perhaps she grew up listening to threatening rants.

At around midnight the Mother shot her two children, the 12 year old daughter and the 10 year old son in the head.  They have survived but are both in critical condition.  Ms. Grimmer then shot and killed herself.  I guess the welfare office supervisor wasn’t harmed.

Obviously, the Social Worker could have used some training.  He’s obviously telling lies all over the place about what was done to help.  And there are obviously some racial issues going on here.

The kid in this situation doesn’t ask for help, probably would resist it if it were offered, and it won’t be offered anyway because family, friends, and psychoblabbers  can’t stand the drama or even actually are amused by it.

The article tries to make sense out of the relationship between this family and the welfare system and it can’t.  It’s so unbelievable it sounds like Alice falling down the rabbit hole.

This brings up a lot of issues.  But, for right now,  I pray that those kids will recover.

Here’s a good article from Australia about Filicide.  That’s people who kill their children.  Talks about connection with Divorce.  And the tendency for everyone around, friends, family, therapists, etc., to go into denial, or at least do nothing.   The grandmother wrote back on Facebook to her granddaughter that she was “there for you.”   She could have at least told the kid to take her brother and go hide or to fake a convulsion to distract the adults.

“Mental Health, Filicide, Parental Separation and Divorce:  The need for early intervention and a better coordinated approach.” by Dr. Daniell Tyson and Prof. Thea Brown.

EDIT added December 28, 2011:  Both of Rachel Grimmer’s children died within 2 days of the shooting.  May they Rest in Peace.



World’s Most Wanted
September 27, 2011, 9:05 pm
Filed under: Violence

This might be a big score for the idea that Divorce makes the World a more pleasant place:  The Wikipedia List of the current World’s Most Wanted Men.

I can’t tell for sure but I think that most of them come from Intact Families.

Sigh, not even the FBI and Interpol want us…  Well, it’s a good thing to lack self-esteem and a carefree childhood.

Either that, or it helps to have been exposed to one’s own private War in one’s family early on in life to know what’s not worth pursuing in life.

Astrologically there’s an interesting thing going on here.  I could only find the birth dates of 8 out of the 10 men on the list.  The other dates may be wrong as well since most of them have multiple names and birth dates.  Anyway, 6 out of 10 of these guys are born under Cardinal Sun Signs.  This means that the current powerful outer planet t-square has stressed them out.  I mean, I’m sure most of them wish back to the good old days when they could run around committing mayhem in private, without all this spy camera stuff.



Brazil Feeds Girls From Broken Homes to Men Being Held in Jail

Read an article in USAToday which said that child abuse tends to go up when the country is in recession.  The article says that most of the abuse is aimed against babies and very young children as their parents can’t handle the stress of financial problems and caring for a child.  Why don’t pediatricians ever talk out about this type of problem as it is connected with Divorce.  Doesn’t matter I suppose.  My parents divorced during a recession so maybe the excuse is that I was abused because of the financial problems and not because of the divorce.  The type of mentality that can separate this stuff is called “Denial.”  Nobody practices “denial” more than folks connected with the medical profession — that’s only my opinion.

Really scary stories coming out of Brazil.  A 14 year old girl was released from a jail on Saturday night after being held in prison for 4 days.  She was gang raped the entire time by a group of men who were also in her cell.  Apparently this is typical.  The police capture young women on minor or even false charges in order to feed the men who are being kept in the jails.  A 15 year old girl was arrested (I originally wrote “captured” in stead of arrested because that’s a more accurate description) on Oct. 21, 2007 and held for weeks in a cell with 21 men.

Another time a 23 year old prostitute was held for a month as well.

This article describes how both the 15 year old and 23 year old victims were naturals for being victims of this type of crime because they come from “Broken Homes” and had been molested by step-fathers.

In the U.S., of course, nothing like this could possibly happen.  Nah, never.

I’ve discussed before the relationship I’ve noticed how the news of women who are murdered by Husbands/Boyfriends often seem to come from Broken Homes.  Even without the molestation from the step-father this seems to be a trend.  There’s  a statistic floating around on the internet which backs up my theory but haven’t got a clue if it’s accurate.

What’s fascinating about all the articles which discuss child abuse is that they never seem to come with information that will help the victims.  It seems that if a kid is reading that type of thing he/she should be given some advice.  Guess they can’t do that because the kids from intact homes will hog up all the services.  Kids with healthy self-esteem scream loudest.

 



Bad Children of Divorce – Anders Behring Breivik

On July 22 Norway was attacked by one of its own citizens, a 32-year old man named Anders Behring Breivik. Sad to say, that Anders Behring Breivik is a Child of Divorce.

Breivik’s parents divorced when he was 1 year old (source: Wikipedia). According to my Astrological Study this means that Breivik would have been influenced by and perhaps stuck in the energy of his first Solar Return. In his case this is particularly so because the other two planetary returns that occur around this time, Mercury and Venus, happened early in Breivik’s life, before his first Birthday. The Sun represents the Ego, Creativity, Children, Drama, Wanting to be in the limelight and in a leadership role. There is a 33 year cycle related to Solar Return charts in which the Sun returns to the native’s original house in his birth chart. I don’t have a birth time for Breivik so can’t say which house that would be but I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s the 12th House because this guy is going to start out his new Solar Return cycle in jail.

I wrote about a similar set-up of planetary cycles in celebrity charts of actors Marilyn Monroe and Andy Griffith. I talked about how, among the many differences between these two people, it is remarkable that they both became famous actors. Sun is related to wanting to be in the limelight. When Mercury and Venus both complete their first returns before the solar Return a child is blessed with early understandings of what both of those planets represent. I’ve talked about this a lot in the earlier posts. In short form, Mercury possibly represents communications and brain development of fine motor skills. Venus represents attachments to objects and people and development of memory and self worth through those attachments. The difference between how Marilyn Monroe and Andy Griffith handled their fame is, I subjecture, that Monroe suffered through her parents’ divorce during those years. Griffith also had a very difficult childhood and literally slept in a chest of drawers with relatives, but his parents stayed together and eventually provided him with a stable childhood. So, one can perhaps wonder if a child going through such fast transits in the first year is perhaps not more aware than other babies of what is going on. Mercury is directly related to the the nervous system and anxiety and Venus is related, as I said, to feeling loveable and feeling that one can love others.

Breivik has about 6 half or step siblings (check). I don’t have information about his biological parents’ remarriages/relationships but that will perhaps come out in time.

It appears that Breivik’s relationships with both parents are exceptional. He lived with his Mother up until a few months ago. Perhaps that’s not abnormal in Norway but in the U.S. it’s weird.

Breivik’s Father has had nothing to do with him since he moved to France in 1995 when Breivik was 16 years old. One can perhaps assume that the relationship with Breivik’s Mother became extremely dependent because his relationship with his Father involved the extreme rejection which is common among Children of Divorce. In Astrology, the 10th House, Saturn and Capricorn rule the Father and how one handles authoritarian figures. When an individual does not receive Paternal Attention, whether from a parent or someone else, one can possibly take out one’s anger on the Government which holds the parallel role in society that the traditional Fatherly role holds within the family.

Breivik is an Aquarius Sun and Aquarius is the sign most known for rebellion against these traditional roles. Aquarius has a natural sense of society as a whole and often doesn’t have easy access to expression of simple feelings of the earlier signs. Often, but not always of course, they are the kids who pass through the divorce without seeming to have any needs. I’ve discussed how I think that Aquarius is the sign probably most connected with Divorce. And Children of Divorce might be ruled by the sign of Virgo as Virgo is practical and service oriented and opposite Pisces, the ruler of Orphans, the sign which most kids of divorce get lumped in with (erroneously).

Without a birth time we can’t place the position of Breivik’s natal Moon (either in Leo or Virgo), but the noontime chart shows a conjunction with natal Saturn Retrograde in Virgo. Moon shows the family influence and the Mother so this is an important element. Either way, Breivik would have been born just after a Full Moon. If he has a Leo Sun this emphasizes his need to be in the spotlight and to lead in some way. If the Moon is in Virgo and in conjunction with Saturn Rx in Virgo, this combination with the Aquarius Sun shows emotional coldness. It also shows that the traditional parental roles were mixed up and not clearly viewed as separate influences. Unfortunately, I’ve sort of stopped work on my research of charts of famous Children of divorce because of computer hacking and theft of a lot of my papers and depression which came after all that happened. I do remember that the one signature which stood out for planetary placements in the charts that I looked at was the absence of Saturn in Virgo children from Divorce who become famous. All the other planetary placements by sign were represented in the 135 or so charts that I looked at except Saturn in Virgo. The insecurities of this placement seemed to really stand out as a signature for lack of self esteem. This would be especially difficult in a child who is stuck in a Sun aspect which needs to stand out in some way in order to shine. This is especially important to look at right now as Saturn just passed through that sign and many young children have it in their charts.

Progressed Moon generally has its first return at Age 27-28 and transiting Saturn has its first return at around Age 28-29.

The Progressed Lunar Return can be best used as a time of internal reflection in which one focuses on one’s emotional needs as a basis for going forth in life as an adult. One can feel like a loser or feel picked on in this phase, especially if life so far has been full of setbacks and unsafe relationships. The Moon relates to the Mother and the home life. After the individual goes through this internal phase, he then completes a cyclic phase which expresses to the external social world through the Saturn Return.

Breivik’s Father, an economist of some sort, says that he wishes his son had committed suicide because of what he had done. Thanks Dad. (I guess he’s describing the bottom line here on an investment he rejected long ago.)

It would be great if the Father had instead said “I wish that I had been a decent Father for my son so that this wouldn’t have happened,” but, of course, we’re all dreaming when we wish for comments like those to come out of the mouths of narcissistic parents. How many kids’ hearts could at least find peace if only their parents would admit that they had not provided the proper childhood? Maybe just one, well-timed, sincere assessment, clearly stated “I’m sorry and I want to try harder in the future.” Instead, the Father here, in my view, has affirmed that he is a total a-hole and will remain so until the day he dies.

Here’s an excerpt from the article:

Meanwhile, in an interview with Swedish tabloid Expressen, the suspect’s father said he was ashamed and disgusted by his son’s acts and wished he had committed suicide.

“I don’t feel like his father,” said former diplomat Jens David Breivik from his secluded home in southern France. “How could he just stand there and kill so many innocent people and just seem to think that what he did was OK? He should have taken his own life too. That’s what he should have done.”

Breivik said he first learned the news of his son’s attacks from media websites. “I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was totally paralyzing and I couldn’t really understand it.”

“I will have to live with this shame for the rest of my life. People will always link me with him,” he said.

Jens David Breivik said he had severed all contact with his son in 1995 when the latter was 16.

It’s very clear to me what the problem with Dad is here, but I know that many parents and people from intact families will remain flummoxed for years to come. The Father’s attitude couldn’t be more of a negative Saturnian comment, at any rate. Judgement, Blame, Coldness, Harsh Lessons, Conditional Love, Intolerance, Guilt. At least the Father is now eternally released from having to mention his first born son in his will and I suspect that’s all that counts to this guy.

Apparently, son Anders Breivik sees himself as having defended the country. His motive was to kill the Prime Minister of Norway and the youths who are learning to follow his liberal doctrines which include embracing immigration of Muslims into Norwegian society.

I believe that Norway was having a National Holiday on July 22, so the Prime Minister was working from home instead of coming into the office. So he survived the bombing of his offices and the surrounding areas. Breivik then attacked a political youth camp for kids who belong to the Prime Minister’s party. I’m too American to think that kids could learn to be liberal politicians at a youth camp, I’m just more into Arts and Crafts and the word “camp” brings up negative imagery especially when related to Politics and Religion. But I certainly don’t want to be seen as taking sides with Breivik. And, I also think that Summer Camp is a great way for kids from Divorce to get away from their parents.

I’ve discussed in previous posts how the men who started the “Minutemen” group on the Southwest Borders of the United States grew up in divorce and that I figured that this is somehow an expression of wanting to fix what was broken in childhood. It would make sense if Children of Divorce are much more likely to want to defend their country than kids from stable, intact homes. It is extremely difficult to listen to the chronic complaining and neediness of the immigrants when one’s own life if pretty difficult, especially with the new immigrants who are not particularly talented or special or in need of help.

Hope to look at the early planetary cycles in Breivik’s chart at the time of his parents’ divorce to see if it somehow plays out in his later life. Venus was moving very fast during his first year. Rejection would hurt a Venusian more than anyone except maybe a Lunar type. And a baby is pretty much nothing but a bunch of lunar types until the end of his first year when he completes the Solar, Mercurial and Venusian cycles. It is interesting that Brevick’s Father rejected him when he was 16 years old as that is a Sun-Venus cycle in some people’s charts. It is also half the age that Anders is now. Venus rules the signs of Taurus and Libra. In the sign of Taurus is rules Money, Voice, and Self Worth. In Libra it rules Marriage, one on one partnerships, Open Enemies, and need for Balance and Harmony.

Sun-Mercury-Mars in Aquarius squaring Uranus in Scorpio and trining Pluto in Libra and sextiling Neptune in Sagittarius
Neptune in Sagittarius squaring Virgo/Pisces NN’s
Venus in Capricorn trining Saturn in Virgo, maybe Moon in Virgo
Jupiter unaspected 1 Leo (to major planets), Lead Planet in Locomotive Chart Shape
Grand Earth Trine: Venus in Capricorn trine Saturn/MOon? in Virgo trine Chiron (Dick Cheney is Aquarius with Grand Earth Trine)



Step-Father, Child Molester, Stupid Laws
July 18, 2011, 3:17 am
Filed under: Stepfamilies, Uncategorized, Violence

Story about a stepfather who beat the crap out of his 8-year-old stepdaughter’s molester. The molester had been invited to celebrate Thanksgiving.

The story talks about how the legal system is easier on the molester than it is on the stepfather. As the law stands now, the step-father and his brother will receive more time than the abuser. It also says that the stepfather and his brother would have received only slightly longer sentences if they had killed the molester. Obviously the California legal system needs some revisions and I hope it happens with this case.

From the point of view of writing a blog about growing up in Divorce and blended homes this story is interesting to look at. For one, from the point of view of the little girl who was molested, I suspect that she will suffer less from the experience because people stepped in to defend her. Although I don’t condone violence, the guy had it coming. I have read enough times that child molesters seldom mend their ways. I hope that the family will continue to provide support for the victim so that she won’t suffer long term effects.

I’m wondering about something else regarding stepfathers. It seems that perhaps they will be more likely to act/react with regards to their stepchildren. This can tend to be bad in many situations where perhaps the blood tie connection makes a guy a little more tolerant. On the other hand, perhaps blood ties will often overlook abuse within the family in order to keep the peace. Biological Father’s hands will be tied because of loyalties. A stepfather will see the whole situation from an outsider’s perspective which will often be more objective.

As much as I think that parents and adults in general are neglectful when it comes to understanding and facing how divorce affects their children I think that the irrationality of “family values” is just as bad.

And my typing on my iPad is worse than anything on earth so I apologize for that.



Parental Alienation Syndrome / Custody Fights / Nathan Grieco

This post has grown a life of its own.  Don’t know if I’ll be able to get it under control.

It started out when I picked up a used book called A Kidnapped Mind  by Pamela Richardson.  Haven’t read it yet, but Richardson discusses her custody fight for her son which ultimately led to her son’s suicide.  Richardson discusses how Parental Alienation Syndrome destroyed her son’s life.  The Father had alienated him so that he refused to see his Mother.  Since the boy is dead we can’t hear his side.

Then I somehow got distracted by the story of the man who coined the term “Parental Alienation Syndrome.”  Dr. Richard A. Gardner was a psychiatrist who wrote the first book about Children of Divorce.  He coined the term “Parental Alienation Syndrome” in 1985 and self published a book about it in 1992.  Gardner was divorced twice, had three children a son and two daughters. His astrology chart is really interesting to look at in this regard.

(Astrology stuff:  Gardner’s chart reflects the current huge outer planet t-square that we have been currently going through in his chart.  In the Cardinal Signs, strongly related to relationships on one pole and to family on the other pole.  Uranus, planet of divorce, is conjunct the North Node in Aries (conflict).  This squares an opposition of Saturn in Capricorn (strong influence of Father style of parenting, empirical science) to a conjunction of Jupiter and Pluto in Cancer (Mother, Power, Law).  Just as he was developining his theory about what goes on in these areas in 1985 his progressed Sun was changing signs and was at 29 Gemini-1 Cancer.  That point will bring one’s views before the public, in this case, views having to do with family.)

His theories are highly debated because he did not publish through peer related publishing methods and his ideas are considered non-scientific.  Mostly he defended Fathers whose ex-wives bad mouthed them to the children so that the children would not want to see their Fathers.  What grabbed my attention was the fact that Gardner committed suicide in a really gruesome way.  First he tried to overdose.  When that failed he stabbed himself to death.  This was because he was in pain from a disease called reflex sympathetic dystrophy. Sorry, but that was just more interesting to me because it was so brutal.

Then I was, of course, curious about the stories about how the courts would side with Gardner’s testimony over the pleas of children in custody disputes.  When confronted by the fact that he had set the children up with abusive parents who had then been hurt by their parents he didn’t show any remorse.  Well, that sounds pretty typical especially connected with children and divorce.

The most painful story involved 3 boys in Pennsylvania who were forced to visit their Father by court order.  If they didn’t show up and if they didn’t act happy around their Father the Judge threatened to send their Mother to jail.  That’s not legal and it’s really weird, but, hey, this is divorce.

The oldest boy, Nathan, was so distraught over his screwed up life that he committed suicide when he was 16. The kids were 4,6, and 8 when their parents split.  They grew up and during the year that they were 12, 14, & 16, when they were at the age when kids are supposed to be breaking away from family stuff, the parents and the courts were forcing them to continue to act as if they were 4, 6 & 8.

The astrology is what is grabbing me here because it possibly fits with my astrological theories which connect the planetary cycles with understanding how trauma will unfold in children later on.  It will possibly show how each particular child will react to the trauma and what kind of time frame to look for in order to understand future times when the trauma will resurface.

Nathan Greico was 8 years old when his parents divorced.  Age 8, as I’ve discussed is connected with the first Saturn square in a child’s level of development.  Saturn is related to first stage of maturity, the Father, restriction, depression, social grace (authority and the courts), and depression.  As a person, Nathan was not very good, apparently, at social and physical activities.  I don’t know what that means exactly but he was being treated for ADHD (and I haven’t got a clue what that means except that it shows that he was on drugs).  As I’ve said, I suspect that Ages 7-8 are among the worst for a child to go through parents’ divorce because they represent ages of development that will directly be affected by homelife, tradition, parents and parenting and are often connected with not feeling safe and not being able to handle failure.  In overly simplified terms, Moon is moodiness and feeling picked on.  Saturn is bitterness, guilt, and depression.

Age 8 also figures strongly in another cycle which I wonder doesn’t involve Nathan’s natal chart.  I wonder if he had a conjunction of Sun-Venus.  It would fit too well if he did.  This is because there is a cycle of the Sun and Venus Rx which repeats every 8 years and often you can see this 8 year cycle strongly figured in their charts, hopefully not the traumatized version.

I noticed that when Nathan committed suicide on Feb. 27, 2007 there was a conjunction of Venus 1 Pisces to the Sun 9 Pisces.  The sign of Pisces is often connected with feeling suicidal and like a lost cause so that could be enough of a motive to end it all if things are not going well.  And, as I say, I have no idea what Nathan’s natal chart looks like.  But, Age 8 is the earlier completion of a cycle of these two planets together.  Venus is the sign which rules marriage, harmony, partnerships.  A person who has this planet strongly figured in his chart is thought to become very distressed by any lack of balance in his life because he is extremely sensitive to it.  The Sun adds an element of self-expression of self confidence and wanting to express one’s self creatively and openly.  Often when these planets show up in a negative way, they are also related to suicide.  Sun rules a heightened sense of drama.  Venus represents Love and just doesn’t want tension.  Nathan was upset about everything Venusian.  He had just written about how upset he was over a break-up in his love life and over his parent’s ongoing custody battle and this forced visitation with his Father.  The problems with the Father began when the Mother remarried and the new step-father came in.  The Father’s reaction became subversive and violent.  There is no discussion about Nathan’s feelings about this.  If a Venusian he might just be more upset by people who are fighting rather than wanting to be the dominant male in the family the way other boys might figure in.  It’s also very interesting that he was involved in an argument over brainwashing which could be construed as a Venus type of problem.

So, as theoretical as this is, I suppose it shows another example of what I’m talking about.  Perhaps what to look for in individual children.  And what to avoid. And when.

Article about Nathan Griecohttp://groups.yahoo.com/group/FAMILYCOURTREFORM/message/4183

The Pittsburg paper wrote a really great series about the Greico Divorce and the misuse of Parental Alienation Syndrome as used by the courts in child custody hearings.

http://www.post-gazette.com  http://www.post-gazette.com/custody/parttwo.asp

The surviving brothers talking about how the minute they turn 18 they are out the door.  The older one says that he will bring the younger one with him.  Protective.

Here’s another article about how this theory is sending more children into harms way with abusive people:

Mar. 2, 2011 article from SF Weekly newspaper:  California Family Courts Helping Pedophiles, Batterers Get Child Custody”  by Peter Jamison.

The basic argument, I guess, is that it’s great that parents want to stay in their children’s lives.  But, people who are going through a divorce are really not the healthiest people in the world to be around.

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